07.01.10 : Confessions of a Pyromaniac
While lying in bed the other night, I had a hard time containing my anger as the neighbor boys lit bottle rockets and firecrackers. Couldn’t they have their fun someplace else?! Although my sleep was interrupted – it got me thinking. As the Fourth of July weekend approaches, who’s spending money on fun that lasts for only a few seconds? Where are they getting these explosives, and why aren’t they lighting them off in the snow?
We have a friend, for anonymity we’ll call “Bob”. “Bob” spends 6 months of the year cruising fireworks message boards and websites – watching videos, reading reviews. His annual explosives shopping list is written before the final snowfall of the year, and he actually has his girlfriend film his debauchery in action. We caught up with “Bob” this week, to discuss what fuels this addiction. Below is the Confessions of a Pyromaniac…
(The Red Chair:) How early in the year do you start planning for the summer fireworks season?
(BOB:) Info about the new products starts to roll in around January but the main planning starts in the middle of April. Containers start showing up from China and wholesalers have demo nights to showcase their wares to prospective buyers. Planning the buy and show takes around a month to complete.
(RC:) Is the Fourth of July your biggest showing of the year?
(B:) I do two shows a year and they are both about the same size.
(RC:) How much do you spend on average per season?
(B:) Usually between $600 and $700. I do two main buys a year and sometimes I add a little bit by stopping at stand on the way to the site.
(RC:) What’s the difference between buying fireworks locally, and driving across the border into Wisconsin? Is there a risk to driving over?
(B:) Unfortunately, all the good stuff is illegal here so driving across the border is pretty much mandatory. They funny part is that they are illegal in Wisconsin too. They will only sell to out of state residents and you have to sign a bill of landing stating that you will transport them out of state. The risk is pretty minimal if you go off-season and drive safely.
So, as you stand along the parade-route, sparklers in hand…realize that for some, this is a lifestyle. Now, let’s celebrate the independence of our country…by blowing a little bit of it up.
